How To: Convince Your Husband To Buy You a Puppy.

I was so excited when we got Gatsby in November, I never blogged about how we got Gatsby.  Since my husband was 100% team no-puppy-ever, I bring you..

SIX STEPS TO CONVINCE YOUR HUSBAND YOU NEED A PUPPY.

Step One: Ask for a puppy every single day. 

I started asking for a puppy the day after we got back from our honeymoon, and I didn't stop.  I rationalized why we needed one.  I made pros and cons lists--the con was always "too much happiness" or something like that.  If it was a day that ended in Y, it was a day I was going to ask for a puppy.

Step Two: Start sending him pictures of really cute puppies. 

Did you know pinterest has an entire animal section?  Hello, tiny puppy in a boot.  Work your magic.

Step Three: Find yourself in a situation where there are a lot of puppies. 

We were driving home from church and passed a man holding a sign that said "Puppy Sale."  So naturally, I screamed excitedly until he turned the car around. Since I married the greatest guy ever, he eventually did turn the car around.  We walked into the pet store, and our conversation went something like this:

Chris: You do understand that we're not getting a puppy today, right?
Me: Mmhmm.
Chris: Seriously, don't get attached to anything.  We're not leaving here with a puppy.
Me: Okay, okay. Wait, is that a fox?

Step Four:  Fall in Love. 

I have always been dead set on wanting a lab.  I grew up with labs and I think they're just the sweetest puppies in the world.  But I walked over to look at this one puppy because I kind of thought that maybe he was a fox and not a puppy. I put my hand on the glass AND HE PUT HIS PAW UP AGAINST MY HAND LIKE WE WERE IN THE MOVIES.

Chris: He's cute.  Come on, let's go eat.
Me: Falling in love. 
Chris: Chels...
Me: He wants to come home with me.
Chris: No, he doesn't.  He likes it here. He told me.  Let's go.
Random pet store lady: Would you like a private cuddle room with this dog? 
Me: !!!!!!!
Chris: silently shooting expletives at this woman with his brain. 

Step Five: Get your husband to also fall in love. Also, get a private cuddle room, if at all possible. 

Me: He has to come home with us.
Chris: No, no he doesn't.  We're not getting a dog.
Hands dog over to chris, and whom he promptly snuggles up to.
Chris: Well, maybe we can get a dog next year.
Dog starts making whimpering noises.
Chris: Maybe if he's still here after Christmas, we can talk about it.
Me: Dies on the inside as I have to give the puppy, who I've already named Gatsby, back to the pet store lady.  Also shoots eye daggers at the people casually waiting by my private cuddle room, looking at my dog. 

Step Six: Turn into a crazy person. 

But really.  I had taken a picture of Gatsby snuggling with me, and I sent it to Chris about 170432 times a day.  Then I called the pet store to see if he was still there, and they told me that was going home to his new family once they came to pick him up.  Heartbroken, I rationalized that maybe his new family wouldn't like him and would return him, or maybe they'd forget to pick him up, so I obsessively called the pet store every hour and asked if he was there. Psycho.

Little did I know, Chris had called the pet store and told them that he was trying to surprise his wife, but his wife was a crazy person who was going to keep calling, so they should just tell me the puppy was gone.

Step Seven: Try not to die of happiness when your husband surprises you with a tiny little fox with a christmas bow on his head. 

And we all lived happily ever after.  Until Gatsby at my favorite shoes.  Now we just peacefully coexist.