One Thousand, Three Hundred and Eighty Days.

One thousand, three hundred and eighty days ago, I was desperately trying to catch a plane from LA to Orlando. I had been in Los Angeles all week as a sponsor on a youth trip, but I was supposed to fly back Sunday morning because Chris' White Coat Ceremony was Monday morning.
What happened instead was something like 3 delayed flights, two canceled flights, twelve hours in an airport, and finally getting on a red-eye. I was so tired and ready to sleep, but I ended up in a middle seat between two obnoxious frat guys (Side note: The second they walked on the plane I just knew they were my seat partners. I have bad luck like that) and when I dozed off at first, I woke up to both of them trying to cuddle with my arms (umm, nope), so I didn't sleep after that. 
We made it to Orlando just in time for me to sprint to the parking lot, hop in Christopher's car, change on the way, and then sprint into the building so he could make it on time for the ceremony. 
Cute hair? Nah. Makeup? What's that? 
I'll be honest: It was a pretty boring ceremony for all those not getting their White Coats. There were so many speeches and questions and answers and it went on and on and on. But it's a day I'll never forget. Because at the end, they rolled out this giant chalkboard that said "Good Doctor" at the top. Then the dean asked everyone what they thought it took to be a good doctor. The answers ranged from compassionate to hard-working to endurance. The dean filled the chalkboard--that has stayed in the lobby of the med-school for the past 1,380 days--with at least a hundred answers. And I thought, Wow, Chris is actually all of these things. 
Up until that point, my poor, naive self had thought of med-school kind of like a Master's program. I didn't yet know all it would entail, didn't know how hard it was, didn't know the gravity of making a choice to be a doctor. That day, seeing all of those answers about what it takes to be a good doctor, and seeing Chris get his first white coat...I think that was the first day I imagined him as an actual doctor. 
I thought, wow, he's going to be a really good doctor. 
One thousand, three hundred and eighty days have passed since then. They've been full. Full of adventure and hard work and tough decisions and sleepless nights and new chapters and happy moments and tears and perseverance. And for him, they've been full of every single one of those answers that got written on that chalkboard. 
In three days, Chris will graduate and become a doctor. He'll get to see his dream become a reality. There will be no more one day, no more eventually. There will be graduation, and there will be Christopher, the love of my life, the doctor. 
The good doctor. 
To say I am excited is a massive understatement. Very rarely in life do we get such big moments that mark hard work and success, but Friday is one of those moments. 
If you need me, I'll be dancing around my apartment surrounded by moving boxes, somewhere between packing and procrastinating and celebrating the fact that sometimes, dreams really do come true. 

Married in Med School: What You Need to Know.

1. No one really cares that you're married. Let's just get this out of the way...it doesn't matter that you're married. It doesn't change anything for anyone other than you. Your spouse does not get extra vacation days simply because they have a wife who would like to go on vacation.

I know, the world is a cruel and unfair place.

2. "Final schedule" is a loose term. I cannot even tell you how many times I have seen the final, final schedule...only for it to change two days later. Don't get attached to any schedule, because it will change, probably more than once. If you're not flexible now...well, you're about to learn how to be.

3. Free time doesn't really exist. They get time off, of course, but that time is filled with a horrible way to spend weekends that is commonly known as studying. But that teaches you to cherish time. Because when you do get time off, whether it's 15 minutes or an entire weekend, you know just how special it is. I almost cry of happiness when we get a weekend together. It's the little things.

4. It's a career, not a college major. There is no skipping classes all semester to go to the beach. It's a job...it just happens to come with homework and tests and studying.

5. You have to be on each other's team. You're in this together. Fighting over things that neither one of you have control over is just a recipe for disaster. Don't do it. Dream together about the future, complain together about the present..just do it together. You're not on opposing sides.

6. You need to have your own hobbies. I remember when we were talking about getting married, and Chris asked me, "What are you going to do while I'm studying all the time?" And I replied, "I'll just read books!" HA. I love reading more than anyone else I know...and I get sick of reading before the studying ends.

Have your own hobbies, please. This is the biggest favor you can do for yourself. I love all things crafty, so whenever Chris has a test or something coming up, I raid Hobby Lobby and spend my weekends covered in glitter. Have something you can look forward to doing alone, it makes things so much easier.

7. Lower your expectations. I heard this advice so much, and it made me so angry every time. Like, I'm just supposed to have low expectations for my marriage? Rude. BUT...there actually is a lot of truth to it. I think a better way to say this is adjust your expectations. Realize that this is a season of your life where flexible plans are the best. Have realistic expectations, and you'll be pleasantly surprised.

8. Don't always be looking forward. This is the biggest thing I have learned over the last three years. There's always a "next step." Something big is always around the corner. But if you're constantly looking at what's coming up instead of what's actually happening, you miss out on so much.

Of course I'm excited for med-school to be over. But that doesn't mean the past three years haven't been full of adventures and good memories. Open your eyes and take it in now, instead of waiting for something that's just going to turn into waiting for something else.

9. They can't do it without you. I mean, they made it into med school, so in all reality they're smart and could do it without you. But they married you, so obviously they don't want to. You're in this together.

10. You control how situations turn out. 

Look for the good in every single day, and you will find it. Have an adventurous attitude and know that you will never get this time in your life back, so make the very most of it. It can be the best time of your life or it can be the worst time of your life, and you're the one who gets to decide what it's going to be.

What advice do you have for being married to someone with a difficult career?

10 things you hear when your husband is a medical student.

Let me start off by saying that I love being a med-school wife.  I love it because being married to someone who is doing what they absolutely love is really just the best thing in the world. Yesterday, Chris delivered a baby, so we celebrated with champagne.  I mean, that's just fun.

Of course, not everyone understands that, and sometimes that lack of understanding comes across in the form of terrible  hilarious  rude  interesting comments.  Some people are legitimately interested and ask normal questions or make encouraging comments.  On the occasion that I meet a doctor's wife, I'll get something like a salute.  And maybe a cookie and a whisper that it gets better soon. But most people say a variation of the same ten things.  Every time I hear them, I think, "One day, I will write a blog post about the words coming out of your mouth."  Today is that day, my friends.

1.  But it's like a job, right?  He gets paid to go to school?  Did you get paid to go to school?

2.  Wait...so he doesn't make any money?  Crazy thing, with the 80+ hours a week my husband works at the hospital and studies, he doesn't have a second job.  I know, I know, what a bum he is.

3.  Loans are such a bad idea.  So is giving unsolicited financial advice.

4.  How do you even live like that?  <-- WHAT IS THIS QUESTION?!  Why do I hear it so much?!

5.  "So are you like, poor?"  There can only be two outcomes to this.  Either we are, and it's offensive that you would comment on it, or we aren't, and it's offensive that you would think so.  You should just always skip this question.

6.  You guys must have so much free time since he doesn't have a job.  

 7.  Oh!  So it's like Grey's Anatomy?  I can't even tell you how many people say this after I explain something like residency.  I've never actually seen Grey's Anatomy, but I usually just say yes anyway.

8.  Why didn't you just wait until after med school to get married?  I don't know...love, maybe?  Let's just go ahead and say that if someone is already married, you should probably never, ever ask them why they got married.

9.  It must be so nice to never have to go to the doctor!  On the days I'm feeling feisty (ahem, every day), I'll ask them if they've ever seen anything on TV about someone who was not a doctor, but kept a full stash of prescription drugs in their house...they say yes, and it's almost always a 60 Minutes or a documentary on a serial killer their talking about.  So there's that.

10.  So do you like, make tons of money?  

Honorable mention:  I had already written this post, but I was just in the elevator and someone asked me: "So do you just sit at home and wait for med school to be over, for like four years?  You just sit there?"

. . . . 

Thank you, kind stranger.  I now have the perfect ending for my blog post.

Do you ever get "interesting" comments about what your significant other does?