Do I Look Any Different?

Do I look any different than I did last time we talked? 

Because I'M A DOCTOR'S WIFE NOW. 

I don't know when that's going to get old. It's been three days and it's not old yet, so just bear with me. 

Graduation has come and gone, and the love of my life has finally achieved his lifelong dream of becoming a doctor. A real, live, cut-people-open-and-sew-them-back-together doctor.

So, this is it. The end of a journey. The end of an era. The last post I will tag with medical school. Four years of hard work (that doesn't even do it justice) and here we are. 

I want to say that med school has been good to us, but I don't really think that's the case. Med school isn't really good to anyone. It's hard and it sucks and it's exhausting and isn't really good to any student, until you make it through it. 

But he made it through it, and I made it through the four years with him. 

So while I don't think med school was good to us, I think we were good to med school. We made the best of it. Christopher worked diligently and tirelessly at school and in the hospital and then would come home and force himself to stay awake long enough to hang out with me. We made the most of the rare days off, adventured when we could, spent money on fun stuff when we could, and ate ramen noodles when we had to. 

Chris zeroed in on his goals. He bought me a puppy and I learned to not be terrified of spending nights alone. We supported each other and pushed each other and loved each other through every good and bad day of the last four years.

Being married to a medical student is hard and exhausting and frustrating at times. But it has been an honor to stand with him over the last four years, and it is an honor to stand with him now, watching his greatest dream come true. 

One last thing: Life is weird and cool and strange and amazing. Four years ago, I never ever EVER would have imagined being a family of three at graduation. But sitting there, holding Jack while I was tearing up listening to the graduates read the hippocratic oath, I couldn't imagine it any other way. 

yeah, I'll just eat this real fast.

Goodbye, medical school. Thanks for all the lessons I'm not going to miss you. 

Onto the next four years! Team Jacobs forever. 

Feeling So Thankful For The Last Four Years.

GUYS. In fifteen days, Christopher will graduate from medical school. Two weeks from tomorrow, he becomes a doctor. A real life, actual, M.D. doctor.

I'm feeling a lot of the things I expected to be feeling: Relief that these four years are over, excitement for the next stage, sentimentality for the places we've gone and the people we've met over the last four years. But one thing I'm feeling that I didn't really expect is overwhelming thankfulness.

Thankful that we've made it through alive (just kidding) (but only a little bit), but also just thankful for the whole experience of the last four years. It's been really hard at times, but it is truly an honor to get to stand beside the one you love while they get to make their dreams happen.

Before now, I probably would have laughed (or actually just rolled my eyes) at anyone who said being married in medical school is hard. It's school, for goodness sake!

But it's not! Med-school is a full-time job, and full-time school, and boards, and tests, and studying, and surgery, and basically belonging to someone else for four years. All while finding the time to apply for residency and go on interviews and oh, that little thing called Match Day.

Save for the first semester, we were married for the entirety of med school, so I've had a front row seat to all of it. There have been hard days and easy days and exciting days and boring days. There were nights where I would both go to sleep and wake up before he finished a single shift at the hospital. So while old me may have rolled my eyes at you saying your husband is in med-school and it's hard, the four-years-later me wants to hug you and buy you a drink.

I feel like everyone can say they've grown up over the last four years, because four years is a really long time. But I've grown so much, both in ways I expected and in ways I didn't expect. In big, important ways, and in silly ways. For example: The first year of school, I would walk into a room where Chris was studying and see pictures of infected man-junk and scream because my poor little eyes were scarred for life. Now, a textbook can be left out open on a nasty infectious picture for days and my first reaction is, ugh, so much studying and not oh my gosh what is that awful picture get it OUT. See? Growing up leaps and bounds over here.

While I know I will always look back on these as some of the hardest years of my life, I also know they have been the best years of my life.

So cheers to the last four years. They made me a wife, they made me a mom, they made me a person I'm proud of, and they made Chris a doctor. And I am incredibly thankful for them.

What's Match Day Really Like?

I have a love/hate relationship with Match Day. The parts of it leading up to the day...the pressure and  anxiety and how everything is kept in the dark and the complete lack of answers...I hate that part. A lot. But the actual Match Day? I loved it. Best day ever. And I think I would have felt that way even if the envelope hadn't said what I wanted it to say.

We woke up that day at the crack of dawn...because really, who can sleep when they're about to find out their future?! We were excited and jittery and anxious, but (speaking for myself) waaaay less nervous that I was expecting. I think it was just that feeling of...it's here. 



We got ready and then started the day at some of our close friends' house, where we toasted the day we've been talking about forever. It's been really cool to have friends that are going through the exact same journey you are, but on this day-where we were all about to find out what was going to happen to our futures-it was especially sweet.



After a mimosa or two it was time to head to the school, and when we got in the car is when I finally started feeling a little anxious. So we did what any two rational adults would do...I turned on my favorite rap music entirely too loud and we danced it out.

We got to the school, which was all decked out for Match Day. All the pictures I have of us from the first few minutes we were there look like this:



Nerves, nerves, nerves. But after walking around for a minute, seeing our friends and family, and just seeing the whole atmosphere, we loosened up and starting having some fun.

There were over 100 students there to find out their fate, and their friends and families were there, and it was just such a cool experience. The energy was so high, everyone was excited, and it was an amazing thing to get to share with our families.



The whole ceremony took place in an outdoor courtyard. They had everyone's name on a star, all in a circle around the yard. After hellos and nervous chatter and mingling, it was time for everyone to grab their little black boxes and go find their stars.




You got to request who to stand by, so we were between our two best friends from med-school. It was so sweet to get to experience this moment with them, and since I had to stand behind Chris (you know, since I'm not actually in med-school myself, so I didn't get a star), it was perfect to get to stand with another student's partner, someone who has walked through the same thing I had and who was just as nervous as me. You can explain this process to whoever will listen, but there's nothing like having someone who knows what it's like first-hand.



Once everyone got in the giant circle is when I started crying (for the first time that day, so hey, I call that a win.) It was just such an amazing moment that was so many years in the making. There were a few speeches, one in particular that referenced the first day of school four years ago where they all received their white coats. I remember sitting in that ceremony and thinking how Match Day didn't even seem real, it was so far away. It was emotional to think of all that's happened since then.

Then, the countdown. Everyone across the country opens their envelopes at the exact same time. So the whole courtyard counted down from 10, and in a moment that I'll never, ever forget as long as I live, Chris opened his box and pulled out a golden envelope.



A little side note here: The match letters did not have the names of the cities, they had the names of the hospitals. I did not memorize the names of the hospitals, so for a solid ten seconds I was so confused. 

Seeing those words, "Congratulations-you matched!" while standing outside with 100 other people finding out the same thing was an incredible moment.

We spent the rest of the day laughing and crying and celebrating and sharing our good news.

It was a day I will never, ever forget. A once-in-a-lifetime experience that I'm so glad we got to have together, with baby Jack right there with us.

And now...I'm so glad it's over. Onto the next adventure!

I'm Just So Proud of Us.

I woke up today still on cloud nine from our exciting news this weekend. Also, apparently happy news turns me into the kind of person who says things like "over the moon excited" and "on cloud nine." So there's that. But really-I'm just so happy.

I got up to get my coffee and cried actual tears of joy while it was brewing. Usually, any tears that happen before coffee are most definitely not fueled by joy, so that's saying something. I was just so overjoyed by the thought of how far we've come.

What kicked my tears off at the Match Day ceremony was the dean talking about the white coat ceremony-the first medical school event (almost 4 years ago) where all the students received their first white coats. She talked about the emotion of that day, and I cried, because I was there with Chris, and I remember that day so well. And on Match Day, at the emotional, full-circle event, I was there with him again. We've been together through it all, and I'm so proud of us.

I woke up feeling so celebratory. We should celebrate! There should be champagne! And shopping! And movies! And cake! Then I felt silly, because Match Day was Friday, and we've already celebrated.

And then I felt stupid for feeling silly over that.

Because dreams coming true is worth celebrating. Sticking it out through the hard times is worth celebrating. Reaching your goals and not losing your mind in the process is worth celebrating. A good relationship is worth celebrating.

Guys, I think you should take time to be proud of yourself. Of your accomplishments. Of your relationships. You are amazing, and you are worth celebrating.

So bring on the champagne and the cake. Today, tomorrow, next month. I'm so proud of us, and that is worth celebrating.

The Envelope Has Spoken: Where We Matched!

After what felt like an eternity, Friday, March 18th, 2016 arrived. With it came a tiny black box with Christopher's name on it, and a gold envelope inside. On the inside of that envelope was the name of our new city.

After a long morning of nerves and laughs and both happy and anxious tears and hugs and jitters, we counted down from 10 and finally opened that ominous, fancy envelope to reveal where our next adventure would be taking place. . .

I could not be more thrilled with this news. Seriously, I am overjoyed. I was hoping and hoping and hoping for Gainesville, but-and I realize this sounds incredibly cynical-I felt like since I wanted it so badly, there was no way it was going to happen. 

But it did. 

And I am over the freaking moon excited about it. 

I am so happy that Chris is going to get to follow his dream of becoming a surgeon, and that he's going to get to do that in a state that I love. I am so happy we'll be near family. I am so happy that Jack will get to grow up a little Florida baby.

What a journey. What a reward. 

I finally feel like I can relax a little bit-no more holding my breath waiting on answers. I feel like I can just be for a little while. 

But not for too long, of course...because there are houses to look for and restaurants and parks and churches and stores to look up. Because a new adventure is starting, and it's going to be a good one. 

Gainesville, I'm coming for you!

10 things you hear when your husband is a medical student.

Let me start off by saying that I love being a med-school wife.  I love it because being married to someone who is doing what they absolutely love is really just the best thing in the world. Yesterday, Chris delivered a baby, so we celebrated with champagne.  I mean, that's just fun.

Of course, not everyone understands that, and sometimes that lack of understanding comes across in the form of terrible  hilarious  rude  interesting comments.  Some people are legitimately interested and ask normal questions or make encouraging comments.  On the occasion that I meet a doctor's wife, I'll get something like a salute.  And maybe a cookie and a whisper that it gets better soon. But most people say a variation of the same ten things.  Every time I hear them, I think, "One day, I will write a blog post about the words coming out of your mouth."  Today is that day, my friends.

1.  But it's like a job, right?  He gets paid to go to school?  Did you get paid to go to school?

2.  Wait...so he doesn't make any money?  Crazy thing, with the 80+ hours a week my husband works at the hospital and studies, he doesn't have a second job.  I know, I know, what a bum he is.

3.  Loans are such a bad idea.  So is giving unsolicited financial advice.

4.  How do you even live like that?  <-- WHAT IS THIS QUESTION?!  Why do I hear it so much?!

5.  "So are you like, poor?"  There can only be two outcomes to this.  Either we are, and it's offensive that you would comment on it, or we aren't, and it's offensive that you would think so.  You should just always skip this question.

6.  You guys must have so much free time since he doesn't have a job.  

 7.  Oh!  So it's like Grey's Anatomy?  I can't even tell you how many people say this after I explain something like residency.  I've never actually seen Grey's Anatomy, but I usually just say yes anyway.

8.  Why didn't you just wait until after med school to get married?  I don't know...love, maybe?  Let's just go ahead and say that if someone is already married, you should probably never, ever ask them why they got married.

9.  It must be so nice to never have to go to the doctor!  On the days I'm feeling feisty (ahem, every day), I'll ask them if they've ever seen anything on TV about someone who was not a doctor, but kept a full stash of prescription drugs in their house...they say yes, and it's almost always a 60 Minutes or a documentary on a serial killer their talking about.  So there's that.

10.  So do you like, make tons of money?  

Honorable mention:  I had already written this post, but I was just in the elevator and someone asked me: "So do you just sit at home and wait for med school to be over, for like four years?  You just sit there?"

. . . . 

Thank you, kind stranger.  I now have the perfect ending for my blog post.

Do you ever get "interesting" comments about what your significant other does?