Happy 2017!

Happy New Year! We made it! I was out shopping on NYE, and the cashier said to me,"May your best days of 2016 be your worst days of 2017." As I went home to make resolutions and set goals (because duh, that's what New Year's Eve is for), I couldn't stop thinking about that. 
Every year I make lots of resolutions. I spend a lot of time pouring over my life and deciding what I want to be different and setting goals to reflect that. And of course I did that this weekend. But that comment from the cashier has me thinking, what were my best days of 2016? 
My best day was, hands down, the day Jack was born. Some of my best days were learning how to be his mom, and learning that I could actually be good at this. 
One of my best days was match day, not only because we got good news, but because it meant that I had survived the match process, no matter how many times I thought it just might kill me. 
My best days were vacations. A trip to the Keys, a day at the beach, an afternoon at Universal. Time spent just taking a little break, enjoying life and savoring the moment. 
I hit 5,000 subscribers this year. That was definitely a best day. Knowing that you guys are actually reading what I write and that you care enough about it to sign up to follow along is just amazing. Amazing. 
My best days were spent with my little family, spent traveling, spent staying at home, spent making new friends, spent laughing and watching Netflix and playing games. 
Yes, I had goals this year. Yes, those goals contributed to my best days. But my best days didn't come from setting goals, my best days came from how I decided to live my daily life. 

I decided to make being a good mom a priority, and so little by little, I became a good mom. I decided that I would believe in myself and believe in my own strength, and so day by day, no matter how many difficult seasons I had to walk through (spoiler: a lot of them) or how many phone calls with bad news came or how much loss I experienced, I was okay. I decided I was going to savor the little moments, and I did, every day. I wanted the girl who loved to write to grow, so I spent time every day making that happen. I didn't grow because I set a goal and took big steps to get there, I grew because of little daily decisions...getting less sleep so I could write, watching less tv so I could brainstorm, that kind of thing. The day-to-day isn't as glamourous as setting goals, but it is far more effective. 
I want 2017 to be full of best days. Yes, I hope my resolutions help me change for the better. I hope I meet my big goals. But most of all, I know that if I want to have a year of best days, it doesn't start and end with a list of goals. It starts and ends with daily life and how I choose to live it. 
If setting goals is your thing, I hope you set some really, really great ones. I hope every single one of your resolutions comes true. But more than that, I hope that your daily life sees change. That you make daily decisions to be better, to feel better, to work harder, to slow down, to savor, to do whatever it is that you need to do. 
And I hope that your best days in 2016 seem like your worst of 2017. 

Who Do You Want to Be This Year?

Now that we've all had some time to think about//change//give up on//re-do our 2016 resolutions and goals, I have another question for you. Who do you want to be this year? Not what, who. When it comes to making new year's resolutions and goals, we tend to stick to a set of generalized questions that don't vary too much from each other. And that's not bad! I'm a big believer in asking those types of questions, and I do it every year. I think the problem is that we stop with those, and we don't go any deeper.

When we don't personalize things, we end up with goals that aren't personal to us. We decide we want to work out more, want to organize our closet, want a promotion at work, and call it a day. Those are all good goals, they just aren't personal. And it can be hard to feel passionate about goals that don't seem personal to you.

So I want to ask you a question: Who do you want to be this year? Don't ask yourself what kind of person you want to be, figure out what kind of you you want to be. At the end of the day, you know yourself. You know the good and the bad. You know your favorite parts and the parts you need to change. So you know the goals and resolutions that best fit you.

The thing is, once February rolls around and the newness of the year wears off, a goal like "keep the house clean" doesn't seem exciting, or even doable. But a goal that's personal to you, like, "I want to be a writer this year, so I'm going to keep the house clean so I can focus on writing in the evenings instead of cleaning up" can mean a lot.

Don't let this year be another one of generalized checklists, let it be a year of personal achievement, of becoming the best version of yourself, of becoming exactly who you want to be.

So: Who do you want to be in 2016? 

Ps: Please understand I may be a bit slow in getting back to you as I'm either about to have a baby//currently having a baby//have just had a baby. I wanted to keep things going on my blog, but it may take a bit to get back into the swing of things since I'm, you know, bringing a human into the world and all. xo

Happy 2016! Setting Goals: 5 Questions to Ask Yourself First.

Happy 2016! Can you believe it?! Today is a fresh start, the first step in a brand new year that can be anything you want it to be. So what do you want it to be?

I always spend January first making goals, and I love it. I curl up with a cup of coffee and make lists and dream big dreams and make binders and love ever second of it. By the time the day is over, I feel ready to take on the year and am sure I can do anything.

This year is different-baby Jack is due in LESS THAN TWO WEEKS, hello-so I'm sure my goals will change as my life does, that I'll discover new goals I need as the year goes on, etc.

Whatever boat you're in, whether you're wanting to make major changes with giant goals or minor adjustments with small goals, these questions are a good place to start. Your answers to these questions can really help guide you in your goal setting.

1. What is one way I want to be different by this time next year? Don't think about circumstances or things you want to be different, think about how you want to be different.

My answer: I want to be less of a worrier. I want to stop being so anxious about things I have no control over. This has been a crazy year when it comes to uncontrollable things, and I want to keep working on worrying less. You can't enjoy life if you're too busy worrying over it!

2. What is one thing I want to accomplish this year? 

My answer: I want to create a happy, full life no matter where we end up living. Like I said, I'll have to be flexible with all the unknowns this year, but one thing I do know is that I want to give my family the best life possible and I want to be the happiest possible-whether that means decorating a new house or finding fun things to do in a new town, or just being willing to be open-minded about my location. I want to create the best life possible this year.

3. What is a quality I find myself admiring in others? 

My answer: Openness. Is that a quality? You know those people who just roll with the punches and go right along with life's twists and turns? I admire them. I'm never going to be someone who doesn't get stressed when plans change, but I do want to be someone who is able to make the best of the unexpected and still enjoy life to the fullest, even when it's not going according to plan...even when there's no plan at all.

4. What will make me proud of myself a year from now? 

My answer: Continuing to do the things that I love, even though this year will be full of changes. I want to keep writing and keep blogging. 2015 was a great year for my blog, and I know that if I keep working at it, I'll be proud of myself at the end of 2016.

5. What is a word that embodies what I want out of this year?

My answer: Cherish. This year is going to be the biggest yet-Jack will be joining the party any day now, we'll be submitting our rank list next month, we'll find out where we match in March, and Chris will officially be a doctor in May. What. A. Year. I just want to cherish every single day, every moment, every change.

Hopefully your answers to these questions point you in the direction of the goals you need to make for the year! Whatever goals you have, cheers to 2016 being the absolute best year ever.

Setting Goals for 2015: 6 Questions to Ask Yourself First.

Setting new goals at the beginning of a new year is one of my favorite things. It can be really intimidating, but it can also be incredibly inspiring and motivational. 

If setting goals for your year scares you, or if you just don't know where to start because, hello, you want to change everything, then these questions are an easy starting point.

1. What is one thing in my control that I want to be different next year?

There are probably a lot of things you'd like to be different next year, but all of them are most likely not things you can control. Focus on the things that are in your control, and pick your top one of those.

My answer: I'm still working on this answer...it's a tough one!

2. What is one thing I want to learn in the next 365 days?

This could be a skill, a virtue, a language, a hobby...anything that you want to be able to point to next New Year's Eve and say, "Hey, I learned that this year."

My answer: I really want to learn how to use the sewing machine that I got for my birthday last year. I also want to learn how to crochet for real. I realize this is two answers, but I feel like they kind of go together.

3. If there were three things I could magically change about my life, what would they be?

If you woke up tomorrow and there was a magic wand on your pillow that you could point at three things to change, what would you use it on? Your answer probably points in the same direction that your goals for this year should.

My answer: 

1. My house would always be clean.

2. I would be in amazing shape.

3. I would have a best-selling book out.

But really...who can I talk to about this magic wand thing?

4. What's one way I want to be different by this time next year?

If you're anything like me, you're going to have a hard time picking just one answer to this. But it's better to change one thing than no things, and trying to change a bunch at one time is a great way to set yourself up for failure.

My answer: I want to say yes more. It's something I've been working on, but I really want to focus on it this year.

I'm a worrier and a list maker, so sometimes when an opportunity arises, I mentally list the pros and cons and start to worry about all the things that could happen if I take it. I fret over how much sleep I may lose or how much it's going to cost or if I'm going to regret it, when really, if I would have just said yes, it would have been a much smaller ordeal.

I want to say yes to more because I want to experience more, I want to go more places, I want to learn more things, and I want to become the best version of myself. And I don't think you discover the best version of yourself by saying no to everything that comes your way.

5. What is one thing I will regret if I don't do this year?

My answer: Enjoy life more.  I want be the kind of person who enjoys life more and doesn't get so caught up on the little stuff. There are going to be things I really just don't enjoy: car troubles and sneaky bills and weeks where my husband has to work nights. But life is short, and it is good, so I want to become the kind of person who doesn't let those things make me enjoy life any less. I think that not choosing to enjoy life this year could definitely lead to regret.

6. What is a characteristic or a word that describes how I want to live this next year of my life?

I picked a word for my year last New Year's, which is something I've never done before, but I loved it. All the decisions I made, all the things I did, I thought of that word. And it really helped me accomplish what I wanted to in 2014. Pick a word that takes what you want out of 2015 and boils it down to it's most simplistic form.

My answer: Alive. 

I want to live every single day of 2015 with every part of me totally and completely alive.

"I hope that you spend your days, but they all add up. And when the sun goes down, I hope you raise your cup...

I hope when the moment comes, you'll say, I did it all, I did it all. I owned every second that this world could give, saw so many places and things that I did, with every broken bone, I swear I lived.

One Big Thing I've Learned This Year: Getting the Most out of Life.

This year was the first time I sat down and really thought about what I wanted to get out of the year.  Instead of just making goals, I tried to focus on lessons, experiences, fullness.

I'll never go back to just setting goals.

Having these things in my mind and written down where I can see them has helped guide my year.  It's helped me make decisions, both big and little.  It's made me choose things I wouldn't have normally chose and do things with a different attitude.

On January first, I made a list of what I wanted this year.  I wanted to be brave and adventurous.  I wanted fullness of life and new experiences.  I wanted to hustle my backside off and be proud of myself at the end of each day.  I wanted to live and breathe all things creative.

I have succeeded and failed in these areas many times already, and it's only July.  But there is way more bravery, experience, hard work, and creativity in my life at this moment than there would have been if I would have simply sat down on January first and decided that I wanted to lose five pounds and clean out my closet in 2014.

Goals are fantastic, but they can go beyond a project that you can begin and end.  For me, that's scary.  I don't like it.  I can clearly begin and end a 30-day workout, but at what point does "be brave and take risks" get crossed off the list?  Probably never.  And that's probably one of the greatest things that's happened to my life.

So if you feel like maybe you're not getting all you wanted to get out of this year, I really think you should try this.  Focus on how you want to feel and what you want your life to look like at this time next year.  Make some goals that you may never be able to cross off your list.  There's no time like January first, and there's no time like July fifteenth.

What are some things you'd like to get out of life this year?